Relationships Matter – Reducing Parental Conflict

Whether you’re together or separated, the way you and your partner communicate can impact on your children. All relationships have tricky moments, it’s how they’re experienced and resolved that matters.

Research has shown that frequent, intense and poorly resolved inter-parental relationship conflict, whether between couples who are living together or separated, can have an adverse effect on their child’s emotional, social and cognitive development.

Of course, disagreements and arguments are completely normal and part of everyday life but if it is becoming a problem then you can get help.

The Relationships Matter website is a great source for additional information. You can also see our information sheet for more information about the Calderdale Relationships Matter Programme.

Parenting Support

Are you a parent going through separation? Separating better ( is a brand-new mobile app, which can help guide you through the separation process, find effective ways of co-parenting, and sort out disagreements, all with the wellbeing of your child in mind.

Further support services for parents are available on the Calderdale Council website, see Parental support.

Early Intervention Services

The idea of early help is simple: by working together with children, parents and families we can prevent issues occurring, or provide better support when they do.

Calderdale’s Early  Intervention Strategy is a vision and an approach that will continue to be developed by feedback from Children and Young People and Families. The aim for Calderdale is that children, young people and families tell us that the help they got was at the right time, it was good and made a positive difference.

Calderdale’s Early Intervention Strategy (EIS) has been developed to deliver a co-ordinated approach to multi-agency locality working. The priority is to deliver intervention, which is early and focused for children, young people (aged 0 to 19) and their families who have been identified as requiring some support from a specialist service to address unmet needs.

Please see: Calderdale Council – Early Intervention Support.

Women’s Centre Counselling

The Women’s Centre Counselling Service provides free one-to-one therapeutic work for women, with women.

Domestic Abuse Support

Parental conflict is not the same as domestic abuse – however, if you are afraid of your partner or feel that they control your life it is more likely to be domestic abuse.

What is domestic abuse? Any incident or pattern of incidents of controlling, coercive or threatening behaviour, violence or abuse between those aged 16 or over who are or have been intimate partners or family members regardless of gender or sexuality.

This can include but is not limited to the following types of abuse:

  • psychological
  • physical
  • sexual
  • financial
  • emotional.

What help is available?

  • Free and confidential service to anyone aged 16 and above, who has been affected by domestic abuse and who lives in Calderdale.
  • Support is available to people regardless of their sexuality, gender, disability, religion or ethnic origin.
  • Dedicated male and female support workers.

For local support see: Domestic violence support team – Womens Centre.

Further national guidance is available on Safelives.

Early Relationships for New or Expectant Parents

AIKO is a local community interest company dedicated to promoting positive parent-infant relationships and the social, emotional and mental well-being of babies and children from conception to 4 years old in the Calderdale & South Kirklees localities.

Guidance and support to expectant or new parents.

Open Minds support for young people (aged 16-25 years)

Support is available for 16-25 years old whether concerned as a young parent or because parents are in conflict.

Open Minds support for Early Years (0-5 years)

This service is aimed at families with young children and includes information and links to services in Calderdale which help parents and families.

Please see: Support for early years.

Conflict where alcohol or drugs are a concern

Recovery Steps in Calderdale work together to bring a holistic approach to helping individuals, and their friends and families, who suffer the consequences of alcohol and/or drug misuse to change their lives around, free from the need or desire to use any mind altering substance.

Conflict where mental wellbeing is a concern

Calderdale Improving Access to Psychological Therapies (IAPT) helps people to get quick and easy access to the best type of therapy for their individual needs. Many people experience problems with their psychological (mental) wellbeing at some point in their lives.

IAPT can help the person to gain a new understanding of their difficulties and develop new ways of coping. It can also help them to make changes in their life and address current problems.

Relationship counselling

RELATE help all sorts of people in all sorts of situations. They can support people whether they are in a new relationship, in a long-term relationship, or not in a relationship at all. Please note some services may charge.

Local Relate services

Safeguarding and Reducing Parental Conflict

The safety and welfare of children – also known as safeguarding – is everyone’s business. You could be a parent or relative, neighbour, friend, childminder, or you may work for any organisation which has contact with children and young people such as a teacher or a doctor.

Safeguarding is ensuring that everyone around children is able to help the children they know or work with to grow up into confident, healthy and happy adults. Safeguarding may also mean that children who need to be protected from physical, emotional, sexual abuse and neglect can receive the help and support that they need, at the right time and from the right people. Most children generally enjoy a happy childhood experiences within their own family but the understanding of what safeguarding is all about will help everyone to help those children experiencing difficulties.

The national framework is Working Together to Safeguard Children – Guidance.